100 Things

  1. I am a military wife.
  2. I was a band geek in high school.
  3. I am still a band geek at heart.
  4. I like being random.
  5. I hate shoes, but own about 20 pairs of them.
  6. I always paint my toenails.
  7. If I don’t, my best friend will kill me.
  8. I like to rearrange furniture.
  9. My eyesight is on the same level as a mole
  10. I am too stubborn to wear my glasses all the time.
  11. If I am not wearing matching pajamas I cannot sleep.
  12. This applies to matching sheets as well.
  13. I am 25 and sleep with a night light.
  14. I go squirrel hunting in my car.
  15. I am a cursed bridesmaid. Every wedding I have been in has already ended in divorce.
  16. I blame the ugly dresses, not me.
  17. I know I am a curse.
  18. I knew a year before I got engaged I would marry the Hubs.
  19. He didn’t even like me, but I was going to give him no choice.
  20. I didn’t wear shoes during my wedding.
  21. My bridesmaids didn’t either, and I’m sure they thought I was bonkers.
  22. I gained 60 pounds during my first pregnancy.
  23. The only food I craved was anything made with carbs.
  24. I just recently lost almost all the baby weight.
  25. The “baby” is two and a half, and the oldest is three and a half.
  26. I hate dieting.
  27. The only thing I hate more than dieting is wearing shorts. I REFUSE to wear shorts.
  28. I almost never shave my legs.
  29. My husband pretends he finds this endearing. I know he finds it really really gross.
  30. I have a Coke addiction. The soda, not the drug.
  31. I have an electrolyte deficiency, and am constantly dehydrated.
  32. I always have chapped lips.
  33. Free Range Chicken Poop Lip Junk is my favorite lip balm.
  34. I also like when the name of it grosses people out. It’s all about the shock factor.
  35. I am afraid of needles.
  36. I have pierced my navel twice, and have a tattoo.
  37. I am a freak.
  38. I want to be a special education teacher when I grow up.
  39. I have 20 years of experience working with disabled children.
  40. I took four years of Latin in high school.
  41. I now remember how to say “who are you doing under the tree?”
  42. And some other “dirty” stuff.
  43. I do not eat anything that still has eyeballs on it.
  44. I have learned not to order shrimp in Asian restaurants.
  45. I didn’t like sushi until I was 24.
  46. I still think Norri tastes like the White River.
  47. Sweet tea is my current obsession.
  48. I just bought a little pitcher to put simple syrup in, so I can customize my tea each time.
  49. I hate cooking.
  50. I love to bake.
  51. Cheesecake is my favorite thing to bake.
  52. Caramel Apple cheesecake is my current favorite.
  53. My youngest daughter only has the name she has, because I was too tired to come up with anything else.
  54. I am still convinced people I’ve known for three years don’t know my first name.
  55. I know this is wrong, but it’s a fun party game to play!
  56. I purchase “adult novelty toys” for deploying guys my husband works with.
  57. This makes me the coolest wife in the squadron.
  58. I hate feet.
  59. For the first year or so I was with my husband, I made him sleep under a different blanket than me, so his feet would not touch me.
  60. People who dress stupid make me want to poke my eyes out.
  61. I hate shopping at Walmart, but find it necessary sometimes.
  62. I don’t think I potty trained *Z*.
  63. I am having a hard time potty training *z* because of this.
  64. I hate shopping for myself.
  65. My inseam is ridiculously long, and I’m not really that tall.
  66. The only parts of my body I am happy with are my shoulders and my back.
  67. I am a WoW widow.
  68. If we every get a PS3, my husband will be a Metal Gear Solid 4 widower.
  69. Metal Gear Solid is the only video game I’ve ever beaten.
  70. Unless you count Tigger’s Hunny Hunt. I killed that game!
  71. I like to play The Sims.
  72. The thing I like most is that you can kill them if they make you angry.
  73. I probably have anger management issues.
  74. The only Portuguese word I remember all the time is the bad word that starts with “C”.
  75.  I hope I never meet my husband’s grandmother, because I’m sure that would make a really bad first impression.
  76. I can’t wait to go to Portugal.
  77. There is a place with a bull fight on the beach.
  78. This is totally awesome to me!
  79. I have an addiction to the home interior departments of most department stores.
  80. I am not allowed in Bed Bath and Beyond or Linens and Things.
  81. If I’m not careful, I’m sure my husband will add Pier One to the list.
  82. I am extremely blind.
  83. I have recieved many lectures from eye care professionals about my lack of diligence on wearing glasses or contacts.
  84. My contact perscription for one eye is a PLUS 7.
  85. Cheese sandwiches are one of my favorite foods. 
  86. Dental visits are my own personal hell.
  87. I cry thinking about having to go.
  88. The one thing that makes it a little better, is that my dentist is really cute.
  89.  I hate that he looks in my gross mouth though.
  90.  I am a recovered bulemic.
  91.  I like food too much to ever be anorexic.
  92.  I think I’m allergic to gluten.
  93.  I hate living at the altitude I do, because we have lack of oxygen boogers.
  94.  That’s one reason I want to move.
  95.  I lost my daycare license for calling the trainer racist.
  96.  I still say she is, no matter what anyone else says.
  97.  My best friend and I are only friends because she called me a bitch.
  98. I really am one.
  99. I’m always amazed that people want to be friends with me.
  100. I can’t believe you read this entire boring list.