When one marries a Foreigner…

Hi, I’m Sara Long Last Name.

I took my husband’s last name because I’m a traditional kind of girl. So long as you let me play with power tools occassionally. I also was not fond of the nicknames people would continually find “original” even if I first heard it in the third grade. Annoying really. So getting married and getting to have a NEW NAME was GREAT for me! Except Long Last Name is really really hard to teach people to say. The minister at our wedding practiced for me. So he would say it right. And he did. I was so proud!

The new job I should have already started, uses an outside company for background checks. Very smart. I am pretty sure that my prostitution ring charges have been dropped. ($10 a minute is not money to laugh at. The Hubs owes me a lot of money…) I get this email, and it says something along the lines of use this login and password yada yada yada. Except, it won’t let me log in. They had my name all kinds of messed up. Okay, not really. I was Sara Long Lastname. Long being my middle name. Grrrr!

Once I got that straightened out, we were all good. So long as I knew my own social security number. Some days this is hard for me. Most of the time when paperwork asks for my social what they want is 30/TheHubsSSN, because knowing I am the first wife, and who my sponsor is, is all the military cares about. I am slowly losing my identity. I learned my SSN in sixth grade because my teacher was the greatest teacher of all time. But now, however many years later…okay, 14 I’ll admit I’m getting old, I sometimes feel like I have to pull out my card to get the number. Except, I don’t have one, *z* ripped it up.

Sigh. Such is my life as the wife of a pretend foreigner.


2 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Brat said,

    Good thing Social Security makes it easy to get a new card. But I would not recommend touching anything in that place. It screams GERMS at every turn.

    Leave the spawn at home.

    Good luck with that background check. I hope they call me! I have such stories to tell them!

  2. 2

    Faerylandmom said,

    “the pretend foreigner”

    LOL!!! That’s funny.

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